I Am Like Them

By Angelica Mae Balbuena / Winter 2025

As I stood in front of the airport with my bags in hand, both my head and my heart pounded loudly. Boom. Boom. Boom. I remember panicking because my brother had left one of his suitcases at home, nearly an hour away from where we were. My sister, who hadn’t joined our trip to the airport since seeing us leave would have been too heartbreaking for her, hopped into a cab with the bag. While it was true that watching us go was sad for my sister, I also felt my heart breaking into a million pieces once I realized that I truly was leaving one of my best friends behind. It was incomprehensible to me how anyone could be so heartless in breaking our family apart despite all of the fees we paid and the countless background checks we had to do. I didn’t realize then that I wasn’t alone in my sorrow and that there would soon be thousands of families separated in the same country I was flying towards. What exactly makes me different from the millions of others who lost mothers, fathers, siblings, or even their own sons and daughters?

This truth has not always been apparent to me and I’ve even had moments where I would catch myself alienating other immigrants. ”I am not like them. I came here legally.” Looking back, I can’t grasp why exactly I thought differentiating myself from them was a good thing as if being undocumented was less worthy of respect.

At face value, these words seem harmless as they serve their purpose of seemingly praising yourself for doing the right thing. However, it also dehumanizes other immigrants of different circumstances and fosters discrimination where undocumented individuals are viewed as less deserving of respect (Kwan). In this kind of environment, committing inhumane acts of violence appears to be acceptable because of the narrative being spun by countless people. From what I know now compared to the past, I realize that I was completely apathetic to the situation and I failed to educate myself correctly to the point where I was pointing my fingers, blaming the undocumented immigrants for taking jobs when they were helping the overall economy (Miller).

Being an immigrant in general is already a stressful experience, especially since you are moving from your home country to sometimes literally a completely new environment. My best example of this is my parents; they moved from a collectivist society in the Philippines to an individualistic one where they knew little regarding the English language and were forced to leave everything they’ve ever known, even some of their children, just for the hope of a better future. They applied for jobs vastly different from what they were doing back in the Philippines. My mom, an accountant, now works at a grocery store as a deli clerk serving customers meat instead of analyzing financial data, and my dad, formerly a paralegal, works until midnight at a fast-food chain cleaning dishes and throwing trash too heavy for his back. Whenever I look at them, I always get teary-eyed because they look so much older than their actual age from the stress of paying bills and figuring out how to feed their kids. With all the difficulty they’ve experienced since moving, I wonder if this was the life that they were hoping for or if this was the life forced onto them. Not wanting to sound ungrateful, the pay is definitely more compared to what they were used to earning, but is it worth aging faster? Sometimes, I see my parents exchange a quick look, and it hits me hard. They’ve been through so much, yet they still keep going, working late, hustling before dawn. I wonder if they think about what they left behind or if it's too painful to even visit those thoughts. Their smiles at the dinner table might hide the fatigue, but I get it; there’s a whole story lurking behind those tired eyes. It reminds me that their struggle is woven into the fabric of our new lives, shaping each day as we navigate this strange journey together.

Despite graduating with a degree in Information Technology from a respected university in the Philippines and completing various projects along with an internship, my brother struggles to find a job in the United States. Employers often overlook his qualifications, viewing his education as less valuable compared to degrees earned at local institutions. In addition to how the industry is already selective on the candidates they choose to hire, there is also the additional weight of ambiguousness that comes from having foreign education due to them being unfamiliar with the education systems outside of the United States. Even with applications to entry-level roles, he still has a difficult time getting into the industry in the first place. This has completely ruined his self-esteem as he always gets rejection after rejection despite being in the job search for over five years now and has since accepted work at a retail company. He’s forced to sacrifice his passion for technology because if he doesn’t work, then rent won’t be paid and we’ll have to move to a different city altogether. While working as a clerk, he lost all hope in getting to do what he studied for. This is common with many immigrants who give up their passion just to feed their families and often tolerate their jobs just enough so their children may have better opportunities than they did.

Immigrant families endure a myriad of hardships, layered with challenges, as they strive for the dreams they hold dearly. One of the layers is discrimination against their physical appearance and how others quickly judge them as someone who does not have the capability to succeed. My counselor back when I was newly immigrated in high school took one look at me and automatically assumed I would be going to a community college. While I don’t regret going to a community college, I felt completely alone in the whole process of choosing colleges, the application, and the requirements needed. She provided me with almost little to no resources and no help regarding college applications despite my incessant questioning. While devastated to learn that I couldn’t get into any of the colleges that I applied to initially, it felt oddly comforting being surrounded by people of all ages who energetically pursued their education even with their current situations. I started to meet individuals whose stories echoed mine, each uniquely different yet strung together by a common thread of resilience. Many were adult learners who had sacrificed so much for their education, balancing family obligations with their coursework. It has been noted that support networks and community resources play an essential role in the educational journeys of immigrant students, helping them navigate the complexities of higher education (Jiang, et al). These resources not only provide academic assistance but also foster a sense of belonging and confidence (Paterson).

With my family watching the current news, we’ve been feeling more afraid each day despite the green card we hold. The barrage of news about the government's stringent immigration policies only adds to our worry. I have attempted to explain to them that we are safe because of our status, but the green card no longer feels like a safety net. The fear we have today is not just deportation; it's under siege, knowing our legal status can be toyed with at any moment. Witnessing the television news stories of ICE raids, mass deportations, and being torn away from one's family is too real. The harsh truth is that in a country where policy and politics control all, even legal immigrants remain on uncertain footing. I’ve been trying to convince my family for the longest time that the current government runs on hate and that their whole premise of apprehending undocumented immigrants is based solely on racism and how the officers of the law can perceive how someone can look “undocumented.” The notorious fearmongering the far left has inflicted during the election period has rung true and now the people of America suffer from the consequences. Even if the United States does have the right to deport undocumented individuals, the manner in which they choose to subject the immigrants is almost brutal, putting them in shackles and handcuffs throughout the whole plane ride (Zargar). This has a negative impact on immigrants because when people see them in the news in shackles, it solidifies the narrative of how undocumented individuals should be recognized as criminals even if overstaying a visa is only considered a civil offense and statistically 45% of undocumented immigrants enter the United States legally (American Civil Liberties Union).

The fear of deportation is compounded by the psychological toll of living in a country that doesn’t fully accept you. I’ve also noticed this anxiety within our Filipino community, where many have come to believe that being “legal” would protect them. But now, the fear of being targeted because of their accent, appearance, or name is real. This fear isn’t isolated; it’s shared by many immigrant families. We’ve been promised that doing everything right would guarantee our safety, but the political climate has shifted in ways that make us question that promise. For my parents and so many others, such fear is not so much about what comes next, it's about being able to survive in a society that hardly ever gets to see the humanity of the immigrant. Filipino fear has become even greater because this present administration continued to plant a politics of fear and division. There is another layer to this fear within the Filipino community: an atmosphere of hopelessness and isolation that comes from being in the minority of a larger society with a built-in suspicion towards immigrants. Most of my parent's generation thought that playing by the rules would save them and that the green cards and legal status they had earned would be enough to shield them from the turbulence of the political climate. But while the immigration rhetoric gets increasingly worse, they too are learning that no paperwork will shield them from the shadow of xenophobia and institutionalized racism.

Being born in a place that’s the opposite of diverse, I tend to forget how differences in social categories like race and class can often compound into systems of disadvantages (Miller and Bassett). Recognizing how race and class intertwine with immigration allows for a more nuanced understanding of the challenges immigrants face. For instance, immigrants from lower socioeconomic backgrounds may find themselves trapped in a cycle of poverty, facing language barriers and limited job prospects, while those from wealthier or more educated backgrounds might access resources that ease their transition. Moreover, the intersectionality of race, class, and immigration status can lead to increased vulnerabilities. Undocumented immigrants often navigate an uncertain existence, living in fear of deportation while striving to contribute to their communities. These compounded stresses can lead to mental health challenges and social isolation, making it difficult for immigrants to advocate for their rights or find support networks. For many, the support networks that could provide much-needed assistance may be weak or nonexistent even, due to the stigma associated with their status or identity. Upon arriving in the United States and being admitted to the university, I’ve reached out to therapists and there has always been this barrier between us that made it difficult for me to share my personal experiences for fear of getting judged because I am a poor immigrant. While there are many stories of immigrants reaching success, there are still tales like mine that continue to struggle as a result of the current socioeconomic conditions and I often feel embarrassed about how long it’s taking us to be what we envisioned.

Even with all the efforts immigrants make, systems like neoliberalism, a system that pushes for free markets, deregulation, and privatization, sustain environments that block them from achieving better wealth or social status. This system promotes the idea that unrestricted markets lead to greater economic growth, and in doing so, countries often see immigrants as essential cogs in this economic machine. Many industries rely heavily on flexible labor, and migrant workers fill those roles in sectors like agriculture and services, where companies seek low-cost labor to boost profits (Miller). Yet, this demand for immigrant labor exists alongside policies that impose harsh restrictions on immigration. It’s a strange contradiction where the economy benefits from immigrant contributions, but immigrants themselves often find themselves criminalized, facing laws designed to keep them in check (Bhatnagar). This stark reality highlights a troubling aspect of neoliberalism: while it champions free labor markets, it often dehumanizes immigrants, viewing them as mere economic units rather than individuals with stories and rights. The rise of private detention centers, for example, shows how immigration enforcement has become commodified, prioritizing profit over the well-being of people seeking a better life (Zargar). The detention centers also display how the United States government does not care about the undocumented immigrant population as during the pandemic, the amount of detainees has not decreased and has since become a hotspot for outbreaks (Bhatnagar).

Immigration policies are shaped under more political imperatives than human rights concern, as attested to by the pages of history. Eventually, the immigrant experience is a complex and personal, social, and political force. It is a story of survival, as people face discrimination, financial struggles, and cultural adjustment in the pursuit of a better future. To begin to comprehend immigration, one must look beyond legal definitions and numbers and watch the daily lives of people who risk everything in the promise of finding hope. Society needs to alter the lens through which it perceives immigrants, not as dangers but as individuals whose sacrifices and experiences enhance the societies in which they settle.

Works Cited

Kwan, Jonathan. "Words Matter: Illegal Immigrant, Undocumented Immigrant, or Unauthorized Immigrant?" Markkula Center for Applied Ethics, Santa Clara University, 21 Mar. 2021.

Miller, Michael J. "Are Immigrants Taking Jobs from U.S. Workers? Here's What Economists Say." CNBC, 28 Sept. 2024.

Paterson, James. "How Educators Can Support Immigrant and Migrant Students." National Education Association, 21 Mar. 2024.

Jiang, Crystal, et al. "Transforming Education for Immigrant Youth: Perspectives from K-12 Educators." Migration Policy Institute, 2023.

Zargar, Arshad R. “US Deported Indian Migrants Handcuffed and in Leg Chains on Military Flight to India.” CBS News, 5 Oct. 2023.

American Civil Liberties Union. “Criminalizing Undocumented Immigrants: Issue Brief.” ACLU, Apr. 2021.

Miller, Justyn, and Nathan Bassett. "Intersectionality in the LGBTQIA Community." PM Magazine, International City/County Management Association.

Bhatnagar, Prashasti. "Deportable Until Essential: How the Neoliberal U.S. Immigration System Furthers Racial Capitalism and Operates as a Negative Social Determinant of Health." Georgetown Immigration Law Journal, vol. 36, no. 2, June 2022, p. 1017.